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The holiday season is a time for joy, warmth, and celebration. However, for families managing Alzheimer's or other forms of dementia, holiday gatherings can be challenging. Large crowds and sensory overload can cause confusion and anxiety for those needing memory care. As caregivers, it's crucial to be equipped with tools and strategies to navigate these situations while ensuring everyone's well-being. This guide offers practical advice and best practices. Our goal is to help make holiday celebrations enjoyable and relaxed for everyone involved. Understanding Alzheimer's and Its Impact on Memory Care Alzheimer's disease is a progressive brain disorder that severely affects memory, thinking, and behavior. As the disease progresses, individuals may find it increasingly difficult to recognize loved ones, recall past experiences, or communicate clearly. Research shows that approximately 60-80% of dementia cases are related to Alzheimer's. This cognitive decline often becomes more evident during large gatherings, where heightened stimuli can overwhelm individuals. By understanding the unique challenges posed by Alzheimer's, caregivers can ease stress during the holiday season. Awareness of these challenges is the first step toward creating a supportive environment for family members on this cognitive journey. The Challenges of Holiday Gatherings for Alzheimer's Patients Holiday celebrations can overwhelm individuals living with memory care issues. Here are some common challenges they may face: Overstimulation : Bright decorations, loud music, and busy crowds can lead to sensory overload, causing anxiety. Social Interaction Difficulties : Engaging in conversations or remembering names can be difficult, leaving individuals feeling frustrated or isolated. Routine Disruption : The holiday season often disrupts daily routines, creating confusion for those with dementia. Fatigue : Long gatherings can lead to mental and physical fatigue, increasing difficulties in navigating activities and interactions. Acknowledging these challenges allows caregivers to implement approaches that promote comfort and joy for their loved ones. Best Practices for Stress-Free Holiday Gatherings Navigating holiday gatherings requires a thoughtful approach. Here are effective practices to ensure a positive experience: 1. Prepare in Advance Planning ahead can significantly reduce stress related to holiday events. Here are key tips to consider: Communicate with Guests : Inform family and friends about your loved one’s condition. Encourage patience and kindness during conversations. Familiarize the Venue : If possible, visit the gathering location beforehand. This helps your loved one feel more comfortable with their surroundings. Practice Conversation Topics : Discussing simple, common topics before the event can ease anxiety regarding social interactions. For example, reminisce about favorite holiday memories or discuss familiar foods. 2. Create a Comfortable Environment A suitable setting can make a tremendous difference: Designate a Quiet Space : Set up a relaxing area where your loved one can retreat if feeling overwhelmed. This space should feel safe and familiar, allowing for a respite from the festivities. Limit Decorations : While festive, too many bright colors and lights can be stressful. Subtle decorations can create a warm, inviting atmosphere without overwhelming the senses. Control Noise Levels : Keep background music soft. Opt for calming sounds that don't contribute to sensory overload. 3. Maintain Routine and Ritual Sticking to familiar routines can provide comfort during holiday celebrations: Follow Meal Schedules : Adhering to regular meal times can help maintain cognitive function and reduce anxiety. Upkeep Holiday Traditions : If there are special family traditions, keep them alive. Engaging in familiar rituals can foster feelings of belonging and joy. 4. Monitor Interactions Observing interactions can help caregivers manage stimuli levels and provide support: Limit Interaction Duration : Watch for signs of stress or fatigue in your loved one. If they seem overwhelmed, gently suggest a break. Prepare for Surprises : If new faces will be present, prepare your loved one for these surprises. This can help build expectations and reduce anxiety. 5. Engage in Meaningful Activities Simple and engaging activities can help keep your loved one involved without overwhelming them: Crafts or Games : Consider simple crafts, such as decorating cookies or making holiday cards, to stimulate creativity without requiring complex thought. Storytelling : Encourage family members to share memories or stories. This not only engages the individual but may also trigger cherished recollections. 6. Focus on Nutrition and Self-Care Nutrition is essential during busy holiday seasons: Healthy Options : Provide healthy snacks and meals to sustain energy without causing sugar crashes. Stay Hydrated : Encourage regular water breaks to maintain hydration. Schedule Breaks : Plan short breaks throughout the celebration to relax and recharge. 7. Practice Patience and Empathy Recognize that gatherings may not go as planned. Patience is crucial for a positive atmosphere: Mindful Communication : Speak clearly and gently. Give your loved one plenty of time to process and respond. Active Listening : Create a supportive environment by validating their feelings and experiences, especially if they feel lost or anxious. 8. Consider Professional Support If stress levels are high, seeking professional help can be beneficial: Specialized Caregivers : Hiring temporary caregivers during the gathering can provide additional support and reassurance. Support Networks : Encourage family members to lean on each other, creating a collective atmosphere of understanding. 9. Reflect and Adjust Post-Celebration After the holiday event, reflecting on experiences can help improve future gatherings: Gather Feedback : Discuss with family what aspects of the gathering were comfortable or difficult for your loved one. Document Insights : Take notes on what worked well and what could be improved for next year's celebrations. Celebrating with Confidence The holiday season is a beautiful time to focus on love and togetherness. However, managing Alzheimer's care during this time requires thoughtful preparation and patience. By applying the best practices shared above, caregivers can create a supportive and happy atmosphere for their loved ones, making family gatherings a source of joy instead of stress. Navigating the complexities of memory care during the holidays may seem daunting. However, with the right strategies, caregivers can create an environment that honors the spirit of the season while accommodating the needs of those living with cognitive challenges. Embrace the spirit of the holidays with confidence, knowing you are equipped to handle the challenges of Alzheimer's, allowing everyone to create cherished memories together. This holiday season is quite different from before. Things have changed, traditions have shifted, and the dynamics are new. The old advice doesn't apply anymore since it was more relevant a couple of years back. Now, instead of big gatherings, we're all about small, cozy get-togethers with just a few close folks. We're not as focused on gifts and stuff as we used to be. It's more about being genuine rather than flashy. Shopping isn't as important as it once was. We're all about finding peace and sticking to a routine that gives us comfort and stability during all this change. We're determined to move forward and let go of the past. The shadow of Alzheimer's is there, making things tough with its memory loss effects. The memories that stick around, full of feelings and regrets, remind us of where we went wrong. Despite the challenges, those dealing with Alzheimer's are strong and smart. They still understand and connect with us, even when things get hard.

Once a time for celebration, now a tragic tale unfolds. After years of hosting and co-hosting, we find ourselves here. Boundaries have been established, distancing us, and creating a rigid divide in the realm of caregiving on this particular path. The drama that once existed must now be avoided at all costs. The solution is clear: glean lessons from the past and steer towards a future free of chaos. It has always said: Schedule - no surprises. Let me know the time of pick up, location, and return time; DON'T HANG OUT HERE. Nowhere have I ever said don't visit, hang out, and visit someone who controls who she wants and doesn't want to see. When embarking on the journey of Alzheimer's memory care, it is crucial to prioritize predictability and consistency in the schedule. The primary goal remains the safety and well-being of the individual, with a strong emphasis on enhancing their quality of life. By proactively managing stress levels, reducing anxiety, and minimizing temper outbursts, we pave the way for a more enriching and fulfilling experience. Creating a seamless experience hinges on effective communication regarding every detail of the schedule, from pickup times to locations and return timings. By upholding a structured approach without unnecessary delays, we honor the individual's autonomy and independence. This strategy aims to cultivate companionship rather than a sense of supervision, fostering a positive and respectful environment. Furthermore, active participation is essential in creating a welcoming atmosphere during interactions. Merely being present is not enough; engaging in activities that resonate with genuine interests is highly recommended. It is important to discourage passive activities such as watching TV or excessive use of personal devices as they do not contribute to a vibrant and stimulating environment. Respecting an individual's preferences in social interactions allows them the freedom to choose their companions, thereby enhancing their sense of autonomy and personal satisfaction. Whether as a personal assistant, family member, friend, or foe, one cannot have it both ways. Either all responsibility lies with us and we are completely in control, or the control rests with the patient in our care, and we are simply dedicated helpers ensuring a safe and comfortable quality of life for the patient. It is not possible to have both. When it comes to the challenging and sensitive topic of caregiving for individuals with Alzheimer's disease, it is crucial to address the issue of abuse in a caregiver-patient relationship. The responsibility of caring for someone with Alzheimer's requires a high level of commitment and dedication. It is essential to consider whether the caregiver is fully invested in providing the necessary care or if they are merely going through the motions without genuine care and attention. In today's society, where the prevalence of Alzheimer's diagnoses is on the rise, the question of acceptable caregiving practices becomes even more pertinent. The early stages of Alzheimer's can be particularly difficult to navigate, as both the patient and the caregiver are adjusting to the changes and challenges that come with the disease. It is during this crucial period that the quality of care provided can have a significant impact on the well-being of the individual with Alzheimer's. Choosing to provide care at home can offer many benefits, including familiarity, comfort, and a sense of security for the patient. However, it also comes with its own set of challenges, such as the potential for caregiver burnout and the need for additional support and resources. In such circumstances, caregivers need to approach their role with a whole-hearted commitment and a genuine desire to provide the best possible care for their loved ones. Abuse of a caregiver in the context of Alzheimer's care is never acceptable. Whether it manifests as neglect, emotional abuse, or physical harm, any form of mistreatment can have severe consequences for the well-being of the individual with Alzheimer's. Caregivers must seek help and support when feeling overwhelmed or struggling to cope with the demands of caregiving. By prioritizing the needs of both the patient and the caregiver, it is possible to create a caring and supportive environment that promotes the health and well-being of everyone involved. The outside judgment of caregiving can create a scary and dangerous environment for the person receiving care. This is especially true during wandering episodes and moments of anxiety, which can lead to panic attacks and serious heart conditions caused by external influences. These pressures can undermine the perceived independence of the individual in need of care. Caregivers selflessly dedicate their time and energy to help, but when outside judgment becomes overwhelming, it is essential to enforce boundaries to ensure the safety of everyone involved. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything. The details in this post were missing, but it is unimportant. The anguish the one in care felt for the misunderstanding the outside had and maintained for personal benefit, not for the greater good. Alzheimer's messes with the details and short-term memory is always a question, but there is no way out from the chaos and drama recreated for a narrative that fits the ill-informed and dramatic challenges created due to not understanding; nothing stays the same... money and life have to change. With the holidays approaching, the level of tolerance for ignorance is extremely low. Beware, in 2024 there will be consequences for those who are uninformed and those who test the limits.

"Do you know how strange it is to feel your brain shrink?" Whenever I'm asked that question, I take a moment to assess the flow of the conversation. It's important to handle situations like this with care and to take some time to understand the situation. #not everything is as it appears. If I answer at all, I usually respond with the following: "Can't say that I do... will you describe it?" After a general change in subject, either a giggle or a smile typically ensues. The frequency of this happening can vary, occurring once a month, twice a week, or even twice a day on rare occasions. The mood shifts from curiosity to fascination and wonder, never from fear or concern. It's a laid-back evening of 'small talk,' with the room emanating a peaceful and relaxed ambiance. Just wanted to mention this: The mind is a captivating subject of study, with its intricate grey matter. #neurology #alz #care #intelligent Why don't we know more? #wordswithfriends on the screen of the beloved #iPad. 28 games are currently on pause for the conversation to steer onto other topics with a reminder of the most important thing: Not everything is as it seems. Peaceful surroundings are suddenly disturbed by the ringing of a phone placed on a side table next to an exquisite lamp. An incomplete sentence lingers in the air, causing a mild irritation. The disrupted idea now takes precedence as the top priority, yet there seems to be no resolution other than feeling frustrated while attempting to remember their words without success. Your phone is ringing. Out of nowhere, an alert shows on the iPad, a reminder to play a game. "I think Scrabble is a great choice for me because I don't want to forget any words. I recall reading that word games can help prevent Alzheimer's, even though it's inevitable for me. I think it would be good to document my days in the future to help others know what it is like to feel your brain shrinking... Sometimes I sit outside my body, watching the world around me... What do you think?" What do I think??? What the fuck! What do I do? Shit. Ummm... My brain hurts! I think documenting your days is a great idea, how would you like me to help? The games are a great way to exercise your mind. I'm all for it... Do you want to call Xyz? Please be done with this. Umm... Are we good? Help...Help...no, no , no.. . "I'll call Xyz back later. What will you do with the cottage when I'm not here? I think it should be a pool house. .." Or maybe we can figure that out in a billion years? Go call Xyz back and I'll go do ... see you a little later.😘😁😘 " Just don't paint it that awful color we had in the house on..." The conversation circled back to #memorylane for a while, ending with a dinner conversation and hating chicken. As we don't analyze or read too much into the chicken conversation. We do feel there is definitely a 'chicken story' of the past to go with this newfound hatred of dinners with chicken in them, but we may never know. Taste bud changes or a deep-seated hatred of proteins in general and no filter left? #nopretence #nolove #chickens #farm Dinner, meds, conversation, and maybe a tv show or movie. As each day starts and ends consistently, a routine was found in the early days that felt comfortable for everyone living here. #consistency #routine = no anger, resentment, or fear. No second-guessing everything. It means stress-free days and fun afternoons—happy and resort-like #vacation relaxation in the best way possible. #caregivers #alzcaregiver Not everything is as it seems. Caring for another takes: Patience, Research, Crafty footwork, Guts. Understanding Honesty Trust Kindness Verbal skills Word salads Sassy pants Sassy ass All The Sassy's

Caring for a loved one with Alzheimer's disease presents a unique journey filled with both difficulties and rewards. Whether caregivers are paid professionals or unpaid family members, their contributions play an essential role in the quality of life for those living with Alzheimer's. In this blog, we explore the importance of supporting caregivers in Alzheimer’s in-home care. We will discuss the emotional and physical challenges they face while offering practical strategies to ensure they receive the acknowledgment and assistance they deserve. The Unseen Weight of Caregiving Most people see caregiving as a noble act of love and compassion, but often overlook the significant burden it puts on the caregiver. Research indicates that about 40% of caregivers report feeling depressed , a staggering statistic that highlights the emotional toll of caregiving. Constantly confronting feelings of isolation and helplessness, caregivers often see their loved ones shift from their former selves into individuals who may not recognize them. This can be heart-wrenching and leads to a mix of emotions. Caregivers may feel love, frustration, sadness, and even anger at times. Understanding and accepting these feelings as a natural part of the caregiving journey can provide needed validation. The Importance of Support Systems A solid support system is crucial for every caregiver. A well-rounded network helps caregivers manage stress, share their experiences, and receive tangible assistance when necessary. Support systems can include: Where are all my loyal Ride or Die BFFs now? Instead of complaining, feeling sad, or whining about the drama in my life right now, I choose to share a story of what was, and what it has become, and leave it to you to judge if I made a mistake. #memorylane My perspective on this story is based on what I know to be true. There have been no discussions with the individuals involved. No conversations, no messages, nothing. A void and silence: this disclaimer means that the story will be entirely one-sided. In fact, a client once mentioned to me on a Saturday morning that I had lost a 30-year friendship I had worked hard to maintain. Who would have thought that friendship breakups today resemble those in high school back in 1992? #coward #deservedbetter Reflecting on past friendships, especially those labeled as "Ride or Die" BFFs, can stir up various emotions. The term "Ride or Die" suggests a profound level of loyalty and dedication, indicating a bond that can withstand any challenge. However, as life moves forward, relationships change, sometimes resulting in unforeseen outcomes. During personal turmoil, it may be tempting to dwell on the past and mourn the changes that have taken place. Nevertheless, there is a particular strength in reinterpreting these experiences as part of a broader narrative, one that encourages introspection and self-discovery. Reflecting on memories and decisions made is powerful, especially in friendships. Lack of communication with former friends adds complexity, highlighting the silence that follows the end of a relationship. Realizing a friendship has ended, especially without direct communication, can be disheartening. Navigating shifting friendships and unspoken farewells brings vulnerability and contemplation. The contrast between contemporary and high school friendships underscores the enduring nature and emotional weight of relationships. The narrative prompts readers to consider friendship's essence, the impact of silence, and resilience in navigating human connections. How it started... My expectations of a loyal best friend were straightforward: Loyalty Respect Trust Honesty Dedication Looking back, I realize how naive I was. I was unaware of the animosity and manipulation directed towards me. I genuinely believed that my best friends would support me as fiercely as I supported them. I never questioned our friendship or noticed any 'changes.' Stand by each other no matter what. Apologize when wrong Forgive and move forward Today, I understand that the only thing that changed was my perception. I faced my trust issues, and commitment problems, and learned to recognize deceit more effectively. It's a bit disheartening to realize that it took me over 40 years to acknowledge my poor judgment, which should have been addressed during the past 30 years of therapy. #lifelesson Visit when possible Meet for coffee or dinner when available Stay in touch via text or call No hard feelings I need a moment to reassess #life while enjoying a #titosvodka and #raspberrylemonade. Why is this on my mind tonight? It's either this or the chaotic 36 hours I'm enduring because someone is trying to prove a point that drags us back to the past, and I'm frustrated enough to share a bit. #alzheimers #caregiver. To the one who instigated this yesterday, be prepared because I'm ready to confront you and you might want to reconsider your actions. #history #selfimprovement How it ended... Deception Manipulative behavior Indirect hostility Self-serving acts Shattered trust I won't delve into every detail of our parting tonight, but the summary is quite telling. Date xyz. Lie about date xyz. Fabricate stories. Leave when questioned. Exit when the focus isn't solely on you. Let others dictate 'them or me.' Choose them. #Exit I didn't chase you. You Decide... The essence of this discourse lies in the fundamental importance of trust in fostering and maintaining genuine friendships. Trust serves as the bedrock upon which the edifice of any meaningful relationship is built. It is the invisible thread that binds individuals together, allowing for vulnerability and openness. Without trust, the very fabric of friendship unravels, leaving behind a mere semblance of what once was. Loyalty, a close companion of trust, is a reciprocal exchange that thrives in an environment of mutual respect and understanding. As the adage goes, respect is not merely a given; it is something that must be earned through actions, words, and deeds. A harmonious relationship hinges on a delicate balance where both parties contribute equally to the dynamics of respect and trust. It is unreasonable to expect one to adhere to a standard that the other does not uphold. In essence, the essence of friendship lies in the reciprocity of trust, loyalty, and respect, forming a symbiotic bond that withstands the test of time and trials. When was it ever ok? Do you want a Ride-or-die best friend with: No loyalty No respect No honesty I don’t. Maybe it was just that quote going around on social media: THE 3 TYPES OF PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE. 1. The Leaf people 2. The Branch people 3. The Root people LEAF PEOPLE: These are people who come into your life just for a season. You can't depend on them because they are weak. They only come to take what they want, but if the wind comes, they will leave. You need to be careful of these people because they love you when things are okay, but when the wind comes, they will leave you. BRANCH PEOPLE: They are strong, but you need to be careful with them too. They break away when life becomes challenging, and they can't handle much weight. They may stay with you in some seasons but will go when it becomes more complicated. ROOT PEOPLE: These people are very important because they don't do things to be seen. They are supportive even if you go through a difficult time; they will water you, and your position does not move them; they just love you like that ...It’s not all people you meet or are your friends that will stay with you. Only the root type of people will stay no matter the season. It can be truly frustrating and disheartening when we find ourselves caught in the whirlwind of rumors and misunderstandings, especially when they come from those we consider our closest allies. The feeling of being #canceled or #paused can leave us questioning our worth and place in the world. Despite the hurt and confusion that may arise from such situations, it is important to remember that our value does not diminish based on the opinions of others. While it may be tempting to dwell on the negativity and betrayal, it is essential to focus on finding a path forward that aligns with our true selves and values. Caregivers need support, not more stress and discord. Memory caregiving is uniquely difficult in the ways of content and context being so important and how it make the one in care feel. The outside noise of others is deafening and chaotic, and too much energy is spent in the wrong places. Although the reasons behind such behavior may remain a mystery, it is crucial to prioritize self-respect and self-worth above seeking validation from those who do not appreciate our true essence. Embracing change and seeking out new opportunities for growth and connection can lead us to discover new horizons and experiences that resonate more authentically with who we are. Remember, the journey to finding a new lane may be challenging, but it also presents an opportunity for self-discovery and empowerment. Stay true to yourself, trust in your journey, and keep moving forward with confidence, #js. Paid vs. Unpaid Caregivers: A Shared Experience Both paid and unpaid caregivers navigate the complexities of Alzheimer’s in-home care but face distinct challenges. The Challenges Faced by Unpaid Caregivers Unpaid caregivers, often family members, bear a heavier emotional load. When personal relationships are involved, the expectations can feel overwhelming. For example, many unpaid caregivers put their own lives on hold, postponing jobs or personal commitments. This often leads to financial strain, feelings of resentment, and neglect of their own health. According to the AARP's Family Caregiving Study , approximately 60% of family caregivers reported that caregiving impacted their employment, leaving them financially vulnerable. The Responsibilities of Paid Caregivers Paid caregivers usually come equipped with specialized training for Alzheimer's care. This training helps them meet the unique needs of their clients and families. Yet, they still encounter immense pressure as they juggle client needs and family expectations. They, too, can experience emotional challenges, including compassion fatigue—a state of exhaustion stemming from caring for someone in distress. Every caregiver, regardless of their title, plays a vital role in enhancing the quality of life for those affected by Alzheimer’s. The Role of Community In Supporting Caregivers Communities play a crucial role in supporting caregivers. Local resources can offer respite care, support groups, and training programs. Increased awareness about the issues faced by caregivers can lead to tailored community support systems. Community members can make a difference by engaging with caregivers. Simple actions like listening, coordinating meals, or spending time with the individual affected by Alzheimer's can provide caregivers with much-needed space to recharge. The Power of Recognition One of the simplest yet most effective ways to empower caregivers is through recognition. Caregivers benefit from knowing their hard work is valued. Here are ways to acknowledge their contributions: Celebrate Milestones: Recognizing achievements, such as a successful outing or improved behavior in the individual with Alzheimer's, can uplift a caregiver's spirits. Express Gratitude: Simple words of thanks can have a significant impact. A heartfelt "thank you" reminds caregivers that their efforts do not go unnoticed. Create Awareness Campaigns: Initiating community awareness campaigns highlights caregiver challenges and promotes public understanding and support. Thoughtful Reflections: Leaving No Caregiver Behind The journey of caring for someone with Alzheimer’s disease presents numerous challenges but also offers deep meaning. By empowering caregivers—both paid and unpaid—through recognition, practical support, and community involvement, we can ensure they do not feel isolated in their roles. A culture that values caregivers leads to improved outcomes for everyone involved. Acknowledging that while caregivers provide care, they, too, deserve care, is essential. By working together to uplift caregivers, we can strengthen the support structures for those navigating the complex world of Alzheimer's in-home care. Acknowledging the emotional and physical toll that caregiving can take is crucial; caregivers often prioritize the well-being of those they care for at the expense of their own health and happiness. By implementing systems and resources designed to support caregivers—such as access to respite care, mental health services, and community support groups—we can significantly enhance the quality of care extended to individuals facing the complexities of Alzheimer's and other related conditions in a home setting. Together, by investing in the well-being of caregivers, we not only improve their own lives but also elevate the level of assistance and compassion provided to those navigating the challenges of living with Alzheimer’s. This holistic approach ensures that caregivers feel valued and equipped, leading to better outcomes for both them and the individuals they support. It's easier said than done, in my personal experience. There is a contrast between society's beliefs, the beliefs of the person receiving care, and the observations and experiences of the caregivers... Why do people pass judgment without ever seeing the personal struggles that only those living on-site witness or endure? On display... Dazey D Days....How others view caregiving and a small glimpse for a different perspective. in tiny font.

Alzheimer's disease impacts millions globally, leaving countless families navigating its profound effects. This condition causes a steady decline in cognitive abilities, primarily affecting memory, reasoning, and everyday tasks. The experience often feels like a world flipped upside down, where memories are both a treasure and a source of confusion. Let’s explore how Alzheimer’s alters our understanding of memory, perception, and the connections that weave through our lives. Understanding Alzheimer's Disease Alzheimer's disease is the primary contributor to dementia in older individuals. As per the World Health Organization, about 50 million people globally are affected by dementia, with Alzheimer's being responsible for 60-70% of these instances. The progression typically starts with mild signs such as forgetfulness, confusion, and difficulty in communication. As time passes, symptoms escalate, leading to profound memory loss and disorientation. In some cases, individuals may find it challenging to identify their loved ones. Researchers suggest that a mix of genetic, environmental, and lifestyle factors contribute to Alzheimer’s progression. Key features include the buildup of amyloid plaques and tau tangles in the brain, impacting neuron health and leading to brain shrinkage. The Upside Down in Memory Loss Alzheimer's disease can lead to a peculiar shift in perception for those impacted by it. The knowledge accumulated over time may disappear entirely, replaced by vivid recollections of childhood experiences and the emotions they evoke. For example, an elderly woman might struggle to recall her daughter's name but reminisce about a vacation from many years ago with remarkable clarity. This reversal can be confusing for family members, as current memories fade, straining present-day relationships. Our memories often shape our identities—celebrations, family moments, and personal accomplishments all contribute to who we are. With Alzheimer's disease affecting these memories, an individual's core identity may feel diminished. They may repeat questions frequently or recall past events in great detail while struggling with recent interactions. . Navigating the Backwards Nature of Memory Alzheimer's disease frequently results in challenges in recognizing loved ones or recalling shared memories. For instance, a spouse may struggle to remember the time spent together, leading to confusion when looking at their partner. This journey back through memory can be distressing for families, as the bonds of relationships may seem weakened and delicate. Each person's experience is unique as they lose connection with the present, and the absence of short-term memory often blends emotions with past occurrences. During these difficult moments, emotional ties often take precedence over factual memory. A cherished song, for example, can evoke deep emotions, bridging the gap left by memory loss. Caregivers can boost engagement by introducing music, familiar pictures, or treasured items, nurturing a sense of solace and recognition. The Role of Caregivers Caregivers have a vital role in helping individuals dealing with memory loss to navigate the intricate challenges they face. They go beyond basic caregiving duties to establish crucial bonds with those struggling with confused memories. Patience and empathy are key qualities required in this role. The most daunting aspects involve managing a disorganized routine and handling frustration from individuals who may not comprehend the situation. By removing challenging tasks, a serene and harmonious environment can be fostered. Think of it as providing personal support during the initial stages of Alzheimer's, before transitioning to full-time care becomes necessary to support a sense of independence and personal autonomy. Effective communication fosters these connections. Caregivers should use simple language, maintain eye contact, and be present. For example, instead of correcting a loved one’s misremembered details, they might celebrate the feelings associated with shared moments, aligning with the emotional reality without judgment. Strategies to Enhance Memory While there is no cure for Alzheimer’s, certain strategies can help alleviate symptoms and enhance quality of life. Research published in the Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry suggests that engaging in cognitive exercises can improve memory retention. Regular activities like puzzles or reading stimulate the brain, which can slow cognitive decline. Establishing a daily routine provides comfort, offering stability amid uncertainty. For example, a regular schedule for meals or family visits can create a predictable environment that benefits individuals with Alzheimer’s. Support for Patients and Caregivers The emotional toll of Alzheimer’s extends to both patients and caregivers. Support networks play a vital role in maintaining resilience. Support groups allow individuals to express emotions and share experiences, providing a sense of community. Local community centers and online forums are excellent resources for sharing challenges and successes. Research shows that caregivers who connect with others report lower levels of stress, improving their mental health and ability to provide care. The Importance of Research Ongoing research into Alzheimer’s disease continues to shed light on memory loss and care strategies. Studies explore genetic, biochemical, and environmental influences, fostering hope for future treatments. For instance, research published in Nature suggests that certain lifestyle choices, like regular exercise and a balanced diet, may lower the risk of developing Alzheimer’s. Increased public awareness can aid in addressing the growing prevalence of Alzheimer’s. Advocacy for research funding and support policies is crucial as millions face the daily challenges of this complex disease. Final Thoughts Alzheimer’s disease reshapes memory and identity profoundly, affecting those diagnosed and their families. Navigating this upside-down reality challenges how we view life narratives as relationships shift and emotions stir forgotten memories. With patience, empathy, and effective strategies, caregivers and individuals impacted by Alzheimer’s can find moments of joy amidst the trials. The journey holds valuable lessons about love, memory, and resilience. As we continue to explore Alzheimer's mysteries, our goal is to foster a world where individuals still engage meaningfully with life, even as their memories wane.

The discussions echo a scene from a reality TV show, where everyone expresses their viewpoints. One individual insists on fairness, while another disagrees. However, it seems that all parties overlook a crucial fact: I handle everything, rendering the idea of fairness irrelevant. Love and war are commonly perceived as unjust, yet we are now entangled in a conflict that was instigated long ago by external forces. Love has faded away, leaving us in a state of chaos and blame-shifting. Regrettably, some individuals choose ignorance and thrive on unnecessary drama. It's time to stop, reflect, and make a change. There's no room for games or dwelling on the past. I am taking charge of defending us in this new phase and the challenges it presents. If you're not on board, you're against all of us—plain and simple. The demand for 'perceived fairness' from me: that's something I cannot comply with. It's evident why caregivers form strong bonds with those under their care. In my personal experience, I have always shared a close connection with my loved one. Being the first and only daughter, we have collaborated on various endeavors, including buying and selling homes, and our relationship has transcended familial ties to resemble that of sisters. Our bond is built on trust and mutual respect. Why is it difficult to envision the outcome of this situation? Who is available at 5 am, 12 pm, 6 pm, or 12 am? Recent significant developments have taken place in our little corner of the world, but I am not yet ready to reveal the details on a public platform like this one. For now, let me share this: I have been the same individual (adult) for over 30 years. I am fully aware of my identity and capabilities. You will not defeat me. I come from strong women who fought fiercely and triumphed in life. Trust needs to be earned, and I have put in the effort to build it~ There are still some dues owed to me~ you know who you are. Respect is something that is earned, and I deeply respect those who have stood by me through thick and thin. Navigating life can be tough when changes come in waves, leaving you disoriented. You have my unwavering loyalty. Lifelong friends stand by each other till the end. Values and principles are the way forward. Let go of the entitled nonsense, as we live through the decades and the spirit of female empowerment is here to stay #60smom #hippymoms #1966grad If you are within her inner circle, you are part of her world. If you are part of her world, you are included in this conversation. Chaos damages the mind, causing it to be compromised. It leads to unintentional emotional abuse/harm. When stress overwhelms something, it is irreversible. It marks a new phase forever, and it is painful to witness. Understand the situation and set aside your egos. It was never about you, and will never be about you; it's solely about the person who gave you everything and cannot comprehend why you won't mend what YOU DESTROYED. https://www.alzstore.com/browse-alzstore-s/1898.htm

Living in a reality that starkly contrasts with societal norms can be an incredibly challenging experience. It is akin to inhabiting two separate worlds within the confines of a single body. The constant scrutiny and disbelief from others can create a profound sense of isolation and alienation. Every step taken is accompanied by the weight of judgment and misunderstanding, making even the simplest of tasks a daunting endeavor. The continuous questioning and dismissal can undermine an individual's identity and connection, resulting in a profound feeling of vulnerability and disillusionment. Living in a state where your core being is doubted ~ a distressing experience that can impact mental and emotional health. Navigating a reality that deviates significantly from societal norms can be a lonely and exhausting journey, requiring immense inner strength and resilience to endure the continuous skepticism and criticism that accompany it. Alzheimer's caregivers offer their assistance solely out of compassion and kindness, without expecting any personal gain. They are happy to provide support to those in need. Let us all make an effort to foster empathy and comprehension for individuals who are in such a delicate position, as the weight they carry is one that only a few can truly grasp. Caregivers who have chosen this path, whether as a profession or a part-time commitment, constantly find themselves at odds with their experiences compared to the rest of the world. While a few negative individuals may tarnish the reputation of caregivers, the vast majority - around 90% - of paid caregivers are tirelessly working, underpaid, and unfortunately often overlooked for the invaluable blessings they truly are. They are undervalued and underappreciated by those who fail to recognize their worth. I have had many roles. Daughter Coworker Business Partner Co-owner Boss Friend Caregiver No one likes the words of the last and current role. It has a negative connotation and creates: Angst Anxiety Anger Chaos Confusion Disconnection Fear Lack of trust Loathing Sadness If you have never been a caregiver, it is a thankless, cruel, and disastrous role that is polarizing and lonely. A vicious cycle of managing the longest day with the one who needs care and the chaos surrounding those who do not understand. It sounds harsh and demeaning- I'm sure it might. The truth is still the truth. There is no glass slipper or silver lining in caregiving. Patience Understanding Empathy Sacrifice Sadness Kindness Love Devotion Pain Suffering Misunderstandings Confusion Chaos Need Contempt Loss And the list can go on and on... Controlled environments - consistent routines. 'Don't you think you are being a bit extreme?' The answer is unequivocally NO. Why? Science Neuropsychologist Alzheimer's services on a local, state, and international level Governor's Office of Elderly Affairs Social worker Therapist Caregiver support groups Attention to specialists Attention to detail And last but not least... EXPERIENCE You couldn't possibly know unless you knew. I do know what I see, think, and feel. Perception can be deceiving when we base our understanding on limited exposure to a situation. Merely believing something to be true does not automatically transform it into a fact. The brief moments we dedicate to a particular matter each week, month, or year only scratch the surface of reality; they are fleeting instances in the vast expanse of short-term memory. However, for individuals grappling with Alzheimer's disease, these fleeting moments can hold significant weight, especially if they involve someone of importance or trigger poignant memories from the past. Living with Alzheimer's is akin to embarking on a rollercoaster ride filled with unexpected twists and turns. It is a journey where no one, neither the afflicted individual nor their caregiver, emerges unchanged by the end. The shifting landscape of priorities becomes starkly apparent, even for those who may have once been perceived as the least important players in the scenario. It is crucial to approach situations with empathy and understanding, recognizing that the reality experienced by those dealing with Alzheimer's is complex and ever-evolving. Each interaction, no matter how brief, has the potential to shape the narrative and impact the lives of those involved in profound ways. Navigating this intricate terrain requires patience, resilience, and a willingness to embrace the uncertainty that accompanies such a challenging journey. The feeling it's reality: It is more comfortable to be complacent and 'ok' with the lack of detailed knowledge needed to know honestly. 6:30 am is the time to get coffee, and morning medication, and start the day. Breakfast is a question mark this morning as the protein shake is not appealing, and the memories of the past are present. Knock on the door and walk into the room, smiling and laughing at whatever was on the iPad that caught the attention. "The cat threw up this morning." Where? "On the chair." A couple of seconds go by... "The cat threw up on the chair." Which chair? "That one." A giggle and a smile and back to the iPad. Why don't I clean that up while you take your vitamins? "Ok, the cat threw up on the chair." I'll take care of that... tell me about the article you are reading. "I wasn't reading an article." I apologize - I must have misunderstood... "The cat threw up on the chair." I see that - I'll take care of it. What's on the iPad this morning? "Oh - I've been reading an article." Oh, cool, anything interesting? "Not really - she's beating me at Scrabble." I was able to clean the chair - all better. "What was on the chair?" Thirty minutes later, the conversation is logical without incident - no memory never ever happened. The task at hand is as follows: The cat vomited on the chair, causing concern and annoyance. In the past, the chair would have been promptly cleaned after the cat left. However, today, the cleanup was neglected, resulting in frustration over the dirty chair. Once cleaned, the issue was resolved. To conclude, the minor challenges are just that - minor. Short-term memory loss related to Alzheimer's disease is a significant change for everyone involved, but it doesn't have to be complex. It requires: - Patience - Understanding - Kindness - Duty - Ability to find humor - It's not about the caregiver; it's about the person experiencing the loss. The main challenge lies in the daily struggles being already difficult without external judgment from those unaware of the situation. You are not an expert if you don't know the 23 1/2 hours daily . You are on the outside looking in. Don't judge what you don't know. Love and light- peace and calm.🌺

Disengaging has become a pivotal concept in my life, one that I am gradually embracing with a newfound understanding. Reflecting on my past, I realize this notion has not always been easy to grasp. It is a term that is often employed when all other attempts fail to yield the desired outcome of a tranquil and contented existence. Previously, my default approach was to try and 'fix' things, without fully comprehending what 'it' truly entailed. The elusive nature of 'it' was akin to a puzzle without a clear solution. Today, 'it' manifests in the intricate dynamics of relationships and the burdensome weight of familial obligations that feel coerced upon me. The environment I grew up in was far from nurturing; it was rife with hatred and indifference. The adults in my life harbored deep-seated resentments towards one another, which inevitably trickled down to the younger generation. Verbal and physical abuse, coupled with a blatant disregard for basic human rights, tainted my formative years. Isn't it every parent's aspiration to provide a safe and nurturing environment for their children? A space where kindness and decency prevail, allowing them to blossom into compassionate and responsible adults? These were the values instilled in me by one of my parents, whom I deeply admire for their integrity and wisdom. Conversely, the other parental figure embodied a stark contrast, embodying shady dealings and perpetual turmoil. Their disdain for women, aversion to boundaries, and rejection of structure created a toxic atmosphere that left a lasting impact on each child's emotional well-being. Despite the tumultuous upbringing, I have come to realize that we are not bound to perpetuate the chaos we were raised in. We hold the power to make choices that align with our well-being and growth. For many years, I resigned myself to the circumstances I found myself in, accepting them as an immutable reality. However, today marks a shift in my mindset and approach. Today, I choose to disengage. Someone asked once, 'Why do they hate you so much?' My answer many, many moons ago 'You will have to ask them; I do not know.' Today, I can answer with some certainty,' Because I exist.' I understand this isn't an honest answer, but honestly... it's all I got. What did you do? They ask... I asked for empathy for an ever-changing situation, and it broke the thin threads holding this inept group of humans together for the sake of another. I broke the invisible bubble surrounding us, and it dissolved into a puddle of nothingness. Reality is simple. You can't lose what you never had. If the relationships are one-sided- the relationship doesn't exist. This goes for all forms of relationships: Marriage Co-workers Friendship Family Cats Sometimes Dogs All pets All humans Have you ever met a cat who wants to be your BFF? If the answer is no, this applies. Have you ever met a dog who is likely to bite you vs. let you pet them? This applies. Have a family member that would prefer you dead vs. put any effort in to balance the scales and meet halfway? Yeah, well, this applies even if you are lucky never to have these experiences. Relationships do not have to be complicated; they do have to be mutually beneficial. How sad is it that, more often than not, we all engage in a relationship that is: 70-30, 60-40, 80-20, 99.9-.001 That friend who never calls you becomes angry when you don't reach out asap. The wife who creates that life of spoiled, but you can't bring her 'just cause' flowers or send a text that screams 'thinking of you, babe.' Before someone assumes I am 'the wife' in this story... I AM NOT! I receive random 'I like you' texts and 'just cause' flowers. I'm the spoiled in this relationship. It is also an excellent time to note that all this is based on a lifetime of hearing all the stories while playing in hair with chemicals and sharp objects. Like a bartender at 1:30 am and the bar is going to close soon, I am the person who may hear the dramatic start to a better way when the only way to change is: Disengage. Separate. Acknowledge defeat. Move on. My question is this: Why do we hold on for so long when hindsight will show us that the end of the road is just that? An Ending. Maybe it was the wrong or the only route, but the end is still the same. The ending doesn't have to be as drama-filled as we sometimes make it. It can be a gradual 'I'll see you when I see you' or a quiet void. A detailed text of what went wrong or a simple "I'm so done with you, Goodbye." It doesn't have to be: "You are dead to me" or "to remove you from our lives because you don't care for anyone but yourself." Disengagement is a fundamental task of not continuing on the same road of discontent. It is the end of an era. Create the new, disengage in the fight, and fall back. IT IS NOT SURRENDER. It is a stalemate. No one gains in their position; we simply retreat and hope that cloud cover subsides to sunshine and roses after the storm on a deserted gravel road of entitlement and disgust. Disengage means: Ending the battle, regrouping, and redefining the parameters before engagement resumes for a war that makes no common sense. If there isn't anything to fight about, there isn't a fight. Am I wrong? My advice from a place I know all too well: Get off the damn road before engaging in a stupid recurring argument that is baseless. Disengage before a battleground forms. Do not get on the road headed to the battlefield. If you find yourself headed to war, disengage. If you are in the battle, disengage. If you are in the war, FIGHT to win or disengage. There should be no fight when there isn't anything to fight about. It should be a relatively easy day-to-day. The sad part of my personal story is the fight became about entitled perceived control in relationships that were never on a long road. Whatever your story is and with whom it unfolds, know your strengths and weaknesses, and always stay on the right side of truth, honesty, and integrity. Accepting disengagement as a significant concept in life has been a journey of gradual understanding for me. Looking back on my past, I realize that coming to terms with this idea was not always a simple task. It is a term that comes into play when all other efforts have failed to bring about the peace and contentment one seeks. In the past, my immediate reaction was to 'fix' things without truly delving into their core. However, my perspective has evolved, and now I embrace the motto "as you wish." Reflecting on my upbringing, I find that everyone indeed has a unique story to tell. Each individual perceives their reality differently, and this is my interpretation of mine. Others will have their own versions. The past and the future seem to coexist in the present, replaying like a scene from a horror movie stuck on repeat. Time slips away amidst the tangled web of past memories, their emotions so vivid that they almost feel like the present moment, while the actual present fades away. The future appears uncertain, as tomorrow remains a mystery... Each person's upbringing shapes their understanding of life and influences their approach to challenges. It is through these experiences that we learn and grow, discovering new perspectives and insights along the way. Welcome to Dazey Dog Days!

'You aren't a sassy bitch; you are just a world-class bitch with no remorse.' I do not have a receipt for this quote, but it was sent anonymously last night in the comments. It's funny how anonymous people are so quick to dismiss all the things- and it's totally okay to levy an attack on someone they 'don't know'. Now, I'm not saying they don't know me- but as it was important for them to enter the conversation, it is also important to use my right to respond in any forum I choose. Deja vu creeps up so often these days. The anonymity of the internet provides a platform for individuals to express their opinions freely, often without facing any consequences for their words. It is intriguing how people behind the guise of anonymity can be so bold in their criticisms and judgments. While it may be disheartening to receive negative comments from unknown sources, it is essential to remember that everyone is entitled to their perspective. Responding to anonymous comments can be a delicate task. It is crucial to maintain composure and address the issue at hand without stooping to the same level of anonymity or hostility. By choosing to engage in a respectful and constructive manner, one can navigate through such situations with grace and dignity. The feeling of deja vu mentioned in the text resonates with many individuals who have experienced similar situations repeatedly. It serves as a reminder that certain patterns or behaviors tend to recur in our lives, prompting us to reflect on past experiences and consider how we can approach them differently in the future. Embracing these moments of familiarity can lead to personal growth and self-awareness. 'You are not a caregiver...You don't care for anyone but yourself without remorse." A ‘random’ human has this thought of a sassy- I apologize “world-class bitch' -by reading a blog. The interesting part- some of the exact wording and tone used in texts over the last few years~ must be coincidental, as usual... In 48 hours- the hardest in 6 years - I have had comments posted in a very troll-like manner on the internet with some very personal accusations and advice. Instinctively, I find myself wondering about the leading figure in this group. I know two people in the city of one commentator, while in another city mentioned, I am acquainted with just one person, and there is a notable focus on my weaknesses. How much do you know about my imperfections? Besides those who have negative and spiteful views on how I impede one individual. Facts: I am in a boxed-in situation with no ‘fix’. Damned if I do, crucified if I push back. This isn’t for sympathy - this is survival. 2 years or 10… push through till the end and then simply vanish without regret or remorse. It is clear they wish me dead, but what would they do without me? Did / Does anyone have an idea what daily life is like with this?? I know the stress they cause Her due to their challenges and entitlement. It isn't about me! If it were about just me, we wouldn't have anything to chat about, I would have long been gone and out! Did/ Does anyone give thanks or offer help? No. They sit on their high horse and in judgment without thinking about why it got to this. Did/ does anyone want detailed information? Only when crisis is here and then I can’t jump through hoops fast enough. Utter contempt for texting - I need to finish her morning meds before a response in detail. Utter contempt for the word caregiver- Seriously?? Fuck you. Utter contempt for boundaries set~ Accusations: Abuse and harassment of The Others! Not her. (None of them have been concerned about the impact it has on her.) An attorney due to them bringing it up~ Too hard to redact this one; privacy was adhered to. Telling my best half: reign me in, get head out of the sand, you aren’t family, never will be. Blocking Me when you don’t like the truth.~ Jesus, y'all taught her how to block y'all....she simply forgets you are blocked and doesn't care if you get unblocked 95% of the time. I haven’t kept anyone from anyone except: Being around me and Hanging Out at MY house . For 17 years, I organized every birthday party, holiday celebration (both small and large), and all family functions. Was there ever an offer of assistance from anyone? No, it was simply expected. And when it finally came to an end, chaos ensued. None of the actual details were addressed, just one simple statement: Don’t hang out here. This was the point of contention. During the 3 1/2 years that the house was shared, various conflicts arose when I requested the alarm to be set for late-night arrivals and the garage door to be closed for the safety and well-being of others. Since there were no witnesses to this conversation, it spiraled into a vicious and unfounded accusation against me. But I’m the selfish world-class bitch that should be remorseful for my life. I’ve been told in the last 48 hours that I should feel remorse for my actions and that I need serious help. But does anyone text to schedule a time to pick up, hang out at their houses, or their favorite coffee shop, or attend a family gathering at someone else’s? No. I gave updates without prompting so that others understood what was happening. I was told I was an evil person for including everyone over 21 years old. How dare I!!! The reality is these are actually plagiarized words from her—I simply stole the words she used so often from the one they say they are kept from . I ask you: What is MY end game? What is MY goal in being a brick wall and gatekeeper? What do I personally gain??? I got yelled at for letting someone use my phone to call, and the hospital only allows one person in a room at the ER as I’m the one who knows all medical- I am the one staying. I wrote that ‘she says: when we leave we will call at update... I should have just texted Fuck you, as that was the temper tantrum that followed. “You are a narcissist and only want sympathy from strangers.” Fuck you. I take my emotional temperature daily, sometimes hourly. I am not the narcissist, I am the fucking caregiver to the most amazingly feisty and sassy woman who wanted to keep these relationships cordial. Strangers aren’t this personal; they are simply people who have an elevated sense of chaos. Someone once said: “You put boundaries in place, and a war will start”. Here is your new war. Updates ended last night. Communication goes through the attorney. I’m out. I didn’t have to update you when I did before the hospital visit, I didn’t have to update you last night after the drama. I won’t do it anymore. This is MY house. This is my life. This is my boundary. Back The Fuck off. I’m done. Please make sure to return frequently to engage in a debate with me about this particular issue. You don't visit here for various personal reasons. My posts are fairly innocuous unless you are a cast member. The commentator posted that I should feel remorseful for putting personal info out into the world ~ you haven’t seen personal - but test me; I have a lot of First Amendment info that can be recited. Remorse- allowing this behavior for so many years. You are right, I should have handled this years ago. Inform the others; your wish has been granted - you no longer have to interact with me. This personal online diary blog was established in 2022. The conflict has been ongoing since 2017 and earlier. How would you respond if you discovered yourself living a double life, managing multiple obligations, while also confronting the chaos and harassment from those who are dedicated to the storyline they crafted long ago? Until next time Updated for full disclosure: The silence is deafening. Call me out on my bullshit, that's fine- but when you do ~ you're opening the door for dialogue and communication. Let go~ let's have the dialogue.

It’s amazing the only time comments are left on this blog is when we are in the ER and usually by someone who seems to ‘know’. Not deleted, just here. You are welcome to your belief, but seriously- anonymous comments are so last year, and ‘Always' -'only' are very polarizing words. Concerned Citizen my ass. One possible thought: I've heard it all on repeat for so long, no real reason to read it all again... I digress, if you would prefer I speak The Whole Truth, so be it... Not everything is as it seems or for public regurgitation... you are welcome to reach out privately, should you choose. Not deleted, just wrapped up in one place with a tiny little bow of, if you know- you know. If you don't know, come visit here. 9/25/2023 As we sit tonight in the ER room waiting for tests to be run and test results to be revealed, I read the now-deleted comment section. For those who defend a caregiver, thank you. For those 'who know all the parties involved' and the comment sections of this post 'claim the author of this post is fabricating and exaggerating for sympathy and attention seeking, thank you too. If you know me, you know. And if you think you know me because of others. Depending, of course, who the Others are- you might be right. Update and edit: I no longer have the patience or time for them. But a 2-minute blog post in a 24/7 hour day is not for the attention seeking they will claim; it is for a log of how hard this is. The weight of caring for another is heavy, and the lack of support and empathy from the others is vile. I spent quite a bit of time doing updates today to multiple people to find us at this point... Here is the current update for 'the others' who troll. I am in the fucking ER with someone who just wants to go home, feels the doctors and nurses have forgotten about us, and again wants to be unhooked from all the machines trying to find a reason for the why's we came in. The result was she declined further testing, took the lead off on her own, and then worked to remove her IV. Blood everywhere, people scrambling, and a defiant patient who knew what she wanted and took charge. When you don't know what you don't know- the updates are small and inconclusive. I was kind enough to give the updates you received- it won't happen again. From the others who think they know- you don't, never did- never will. I'm tired of the stress caused by the stupid and ill-informed- but must confess- the one who helped find a new cause to the illness that plagues her. The result was this: The stress caused a tachycardia spell. That led to better care in the ER. We have a new path that can lead to answers, so... thanks for the stressful chat, I guess... I'm asked to post my faults: Honesty to the others whether they want to hear it or not. Changing my life because they would never be that selfless Being selfless without an angle Direct and blunt conversations they call abusive and harassing No interest in their feelings as my energy goes to one person. Write a blog to be able to look back on and remember why we have nothing to offer them. Knowing it isn't about me - or them. Being okay with being their villain I'm in an ER room, waiting on more tests and more results for an answer. Back the fuck off. I don't lie- I don't exaggerate, but damn if I am blamed for everything anyone is unhappy with. Do not like what I write? Stop trolling me, I know who you all are- technology is amazingly accurate. For the record, this blog isn't for sympathy; it's for a balance of perception and perceived reality. This blog site is for The Others. They read this shit on repeat. Don't want to read my words ~don't read it- it's not like I sent it to you personally. I mean- I'm dead to you, I'm out of your lives completely, and what was the rest?? Don't want a blog post about something you are involved with or, at the very least, complacent in the actions that lead to the post. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything.. Guess you should check what is acceptable behavior in Alzheimer's care and what it looks like versus the opinions of the ill-informed. She wanted to talk, so you tell her to take you off the speaker and hand me the phone. No evidence or receipt because you are smart and won't put that shit in writing anymore. The things I know- I KNOW. Asking what is wrong with me is a loaded question. Truth is the others. If I could be without communicating with them- life would be okay, except- the question came as we were in the ER, hooked up to all the things, waiting for all the things- without answers to anything... FUCK YOU for the drama. I'm done with updates. You are on your own. And less than 12 hours later, I relent. My Faults this morning... redacted as usual... In a heated discussion, the question emerged: What the hell is wrong with you ? Until next time...

Caring for someone with Alzheimer's disease can be an overwhelming ride filled with ups and downs. Yet, amidst the confusion and frustration, there are moments of laughter and connection that shine through. This journey often leads us to unexpected emotional territory. If you're feeling alone in this experience, remember that you are not. Here, we explore the challenges we face, celebrate joyous moments, and discuss the support available to us. Understanding the Emotional Landscape Alzheimer's presents a unique set of emotional challenges for the individual experiencing memory loss and the caregivers who dedicate their lives to providing support. Caregivers often feel a profound sense of loss, as they witness the gradual decline of a loved one’s memories and personality. According to a study by the Alzheimer’s Association, 69% of caregivers report feeling emotionally stressed. Yet, even amidst this emotional chaos, light can break through. On certain days, laughter can envelop both the caregiver and their loved one, creating a warmth that serves as a reminder of the love still present. Reflecting on positive memories, such as family holidays or jokes shared over the years, can help maintain this connection. For example, one caregiver recalls a moment when their spouse suddenly quoted a line from a favorite movie, leading to an unexpected, joyous discussion about their early years together. The Joyful Chaos Leaning into the joyful chaos of life with someone who has Alzheimer's is essential. These candid moments can come from the most surprising situations. Maybe it’s a funny mishap while preparing a meal together or a moment where your loved one shares unexpected wisdom that feels like a glimpse into their past. Consider keeping a journal to document these humorous instances. One caregiver mentioned how recording a silly incident—like their loved one attempting to pick up a phone that was not ringing—brought joy during tougher times. On particularly challenging days, reading these entries can lift your spirits and remind you of the good moments. By focusing on these joyful experiences, you not only create lasting memories but also help to balance the overwhelming emotions often present in caregiving. The Power of Support Caring for someone with Alzheimer's can often feel lonely. One of the most valuable assets during this journey is recognizing the importance of support from those who understand your situation. Connecting with fellow caregivers—through local groups or online forums—can be a crucial lifeline. Support groups provide a space to share stories, vent frustrations, and celebrate small victories. Research shows that caregivers who attend support groups report a 25% improvement in their feelings of isolation. The community can offer invaluable insights and coping strategies, equipping you with new ideas to tackle daily challenges. If feelings of stress intensify, seeking professional help can also be beneficial. Therapists who specialize in caregiving understand the emotional toll it can take and provide essential coping tools. Embracing the Topsy-Turvy Nature Caring for someone with Alzheimer's can be a rollercoaster of emotions. There are moments of joy and laughter, but also times of frustration and sadness. It's important to remember that you're not alone in this journey and to seek support when needed. The topsy is turvy and challenging, with a bit of spicy fun. DISCLAIMER: DAZEY IS NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. Embrace the topsy-turvy and challenging with a hint of spiciness! This content is one caregiver's perspective on how dealing with short-term memory challenges can help us learn to move forward and let go of the constant chaos that can be caused by those who are less informed about the daily struggles and comedic moments that we experience. We have very strict standards when it comes to what content we share. We never compromise on quality, and we always try to provide a unique perspective. Sometimes we offer one point of view, other times we offer both sides. But no matter what, we always to provide plenty of content and just a little bit of context for a truly wild story. Welcome to Dazey's Diary and the thoughts shared. Learning to Let Go In the chaos of caregiving, we often strive to maintain a sense of routine and normalcy. However, learning to let go of rigid expectations can create a more peaceful environment. For example, if a planned outing to a favorite restaurant isn’t feasible, embrace spontaneity. Going for ice cream instead can open the door to a delightful unexpected experience. This doesn't mean neglecting responsibilities; it's about adopting a more fluid approach. By including light humor, such as sharing laughter when things don’t unfold as planned, you can foster a greater sense of togetherness. Finding Humor in the Moment Humor can be a powerful ally in caregiving. Sharing laughs over minor mishaps or lighthearted anecdotes can relieve stress and deepen connections. Convert simple activities into laughter-filled moments; maybe watch a comedy together or reminisce about funny family stories. One caregiver fondly recalled a time when they playfully pretended to trip while carrying their loved one’s favorite snack. The resulting laughter lightened the mood and brought them closer together. Such moments remind both of you that joy and playfulness remain possible, even amid challenges. Self-Care for Caregivers While attending to a loved one’s needs, caregivers often neglect their own well-being. Prioritizing self-care is crucial. Engaging in activities that replenish your spirit—whether enjoying quiet time with a cup of tea, exercising, or pursuing a creative passion—can greatly boost your resilience. Set aside moments for yourself. Even short breaks can make a significant difference. A study indicates that caregivers who take regular breaks report 40% lower levels of stress. By investing in yourself, you can provide better care and support. The Journey of Acceptance Embracing the unpredictable journey of caregiving fosters personal growth and acceptance. Letting go of control opens up a deeper appreciation for the present and the love that resides in each interaction. Remember that it's okay to feel both happiness and sadness—allow yourself to experience the spectrum of emotions. Acceptance means understanding that you won't always have all the answers and that it’s okay to learn as you go. By doing so, you evolve and deepen your bond with your loved one, cherishing each moment shared. Final Thoughts Caring for someone with Alzheimer's is indeed a challenging journey. Yet, even during struggles, there are moments of joy waiting to be embraced. By navigating this topsy-turvy experience with openness to laughter, community support, and self-care, you create meaningful connections that matter. It's perfectly normal to experience a range of emotions and seek support. Share your stories, cherish moments of laughter, and prioritize your well-being. Embrace the chaos with love, knowing you are not alone. Life with Alzheimer’s may present challenges, yet it can also be filled with significant experiences that highlight the importance of empathy, connection, and joy. Seek out those spicy moments of happiness, care for yourself, and share laughter as you navigate the rollercoaster of caregiving. Each day may surprise you, but with love amid the challenges, a beautiful story unfolds—one moment at a time. DISCLAIMER: DAZEY IS NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL.

Disclaimer: I really am not devious enough to make this shit up. Stay with me; I may have long-winded sentences when we are done. Narcissism and Caregiving I'm sorry to hear that my post didn't capture your interest. I apologize for any disappointment it may have caused. I'm committed to improving myself and taking ownership of any shortcomings, addressing you respectfully by your preferred pronoun. On a positive note, I'm glad it sparked an emotional response that led you to revisit and share it. Thank you for your feedback. I can only assume the ‘ wold ’ actually means the World- but this is just an assumption. Let’s dive into this: “ This is just for attention and my good and sanity ” Yeah, no. I’m not sure the entire world sees it this way, but I value your constructive criticism. “ To feel better about yourself ” Um, yeah. No. I don’t feel bad about myself- seriously, though- have you even read all of this crap? Does it sound like this makes me feel better??? I am also not a masochist. Js “ Blog like 5th grader, narcissist, and should seek professional help... ” The 5th graders must be feeling the impact! Let me elaborate on my belief: A narcissist cannot effectively care for others, and I only look for high-quality professional help; Stay informed... The professionals are having a positive impact. How do you think I finally set boundaries with this group? **“Act my own age and stop trying to get sympathy from strangers.”** That statement is particularly harsh, but it effectively highlights who this person is and why it felt like a personal attack, as opposed to the usual messages from others. I’ve only referred to these types as trolls in my stories: The Others. If you don't know me, how do you know my age? Just saying. --- **“Everybody is wrong, but you, and that’s bullshit.”** I completely agree—it's the "bullshit" part that stands out. Perhaps you are mistaken in your assessments, understanding, and acceptance of how things should work within the House of Caregiving, which focuses on only one guest. The energy and care should always center on the critical individual. The others are merely extras, similar to a low-budget movie that’s more of a cult classic than a comeback story. In the realm of caregiving, the dynamics are intricate and multifaceted. Although it may seem logical to concentrate solely on the primary individual receiving care, the reality is often more complex. Caregiving encompasses not just the direct recipient, but also a network of relationships, emotions, and responsibilities that are interconnected. Every character involved in the caregiving scenario plays a significant role, contributing to the overall tapestry of support and compassion. From the primary caregiver to the supporting cast, each person brings a unique perspective and set of skills. The interactions among these individuals can shape the caregiving experience, impacting the emotional well-being of everyone involved. Moreover, likening caregiving to a "cult classic" D movie captures its unconventional yet profound nature. While the focus often remains on the individual in need of care, the supporting roles add depth and richness to the narrative. These characters may not always be in the spotlight, but their presence is essential in fostering a nurturing environment within the House of Caregiving. Ultimately, caregiving is a collaborative effort that transcends individual roles. It is a collective endeavor characterized by empathy, understanding, and unwavering support. By acknowledging the value of each character in the caregiving story, we can foster a more inclusive and compassionate environment for all. I really do like the suggestion of the word Diary instead of blog. Thanks! Am I paused or canceled? I know we’re supposed to bow and beg for all the forgiveness in caregiving, including the rigid boundaries ~ any and all challenges~ for the need of snowflake bullshit like: You need to change your tone and bring the temperature down a notch, You can’t make me, And my personal fav... you owe me But... Hey, guess what? That's not happening this year. So, here I am, having some Dazey Thoughts as I try to catch some z's after the crazy last 72 hours... Big thanks for checking out my musings on this wild ride I decided to take. People often say I got what I wanted - maybe that's partly true, but you know what? I decided to take a chance - I knew I had it in me to hit a home run. Let me tell you, the stories I share are straight from my own experiences. They cover the good and the bad, the funny and the sad, the thrilling and the mischievous. Some tales are a mix of different stressful situations, while others zoom in on a single topic. Remember, we're in a free country, and as a free citizen, you absolutely have the right to: Head to your search engine. Search for Dazey Dog. Read my Public Sassy Diary. or maybe not... The choice is always yours.