Despite my silence during the recent minor dramas, I now have a question: What is the purpose of making a commotion when I have simply followed the instructions given to me?
This blog post has been up for a month. The drama continues with no public statement from me, yet you have to go hard and try to sound justified in the actions of the few.
Just a reminder, here are some important points to keep in mind:
- She will not spend a 2$ bill from her wallet.
- Her wedding band is still missing, and she continues to search for it daily.
- When you offer to bring her lunch, you end up making her (me) pay for it.
- You seem to be okay with how she is treated by others, and this makes you part of the problem.
~ Deliberately creating an environment for 'wandering', thinking I'm in control when I'm simply ensuring safety in Memory Caregiving 101:
DON'T LOSE THEM!!!!
THAT'S SCARY AND INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS...
Then...
I would be accused of doing it on purpose and it all being my fault...
Yeah, umm no.Sure, here's the revised version:
Did that information end up on a blog post? No, it was meant to be handled in private, as I requested years ago, and it still hasn't been resolved. Why is this now being discussed publicly? No one stood up for her, except for those who ARE around 24 hours a day.
This morning, I asked people to think before they speak, as no relationships are listed and no names are mentioned. Yet, here we are again, after 7 years, almost 8, dealing with challenging memories due to a clearly defined illness.
Let’s talk about my parents.
The one who I take great care of and the non-existent one.
32-year relationships were shocked to know my father lives less than a block away from my house.
Some are even shocked to know my father is alive and kicking.
Why is that? What is there to talk about? No relationship, no communication, and nothing to share.
My help for him isn’t wanted by the ‘2 guys’ you speak of, and when it was asked of me, it was always given - even at the inconvenience of the one who wants my assistance. The others are welcome to join in on this lack of communication - I’m not the one angry or holding on to something that never existed.
It is my duty to ensure her safety!
My loyalty is to one person: the mom who chose to give the whole cast a better existence without the drama as best she could. You had my loyalty until it was made clear I didn’t have it back. The end.
Do I bitch and complain about my role? No. I no longer keep the secrets of how this works with The Others who are so self-absorbed they can’t see past their own mistakes in the challenges of memory care and Alzheimer’s! My life is easier without the noise.
Crickets! Always crickets when asked direct questions. You want the conversation- have it.
Comments