Caregiving for a family member could be considered a very positive experience with the guidelines and assistance of professionals for the lifelong work of providing care for another in need. In the last seven years, I have been vilified, accosted, and egregiously verbally abused for doing all the things the professionals and the one asked for.
It could be argued that I deserve the hatred and accusations from others, and maybe you reading this have feelings of anger or pity. My answer to both - you are welcome to your feelings, whether they hold or are just perceptions of what is not to be confused with the reality of life lived.
I owe no explanations or excuses, no apologies or empathy for the outside world that neither shows up nor shares the weight of responsibility emotionally nor financially.
The facts are the facts. There are no grey areas here in the caring assisted living for only one.
You got what you wanted!
What was it that I wanted?
Understanding
Kindness
Empathy
Boundaries
Yeah, I didn't get what I wanted or asked for. I have a lonely existence, putting my personal/professional goals on hold for as long as needed, slowly passing by any chance of achieving as time is accelerating, never to return.
It is argued that I have no right to display the drama as it unfolds due to painting a picture of malintent and division. There was also a short discussion of ‘bullying.’ Yet, it is all about the others being abused, not the actions of the others who created the chaos and iron cuffs of no return to a simpler time when pretending to exist peacefully was way less likely to cause a meltdown.
It is said I'm not getting enough attention at home, and that has caused me to react and lash out; you should read the comment section post for the highlights of that abuse. The misogynistic, vicious tone is so worthy of cancel culture vibes.
Living with Alzheimer's disease can be a challenging and emotionally taxing journey, not only for the individual diagnosed but also for their loved ones and caregivers. As the disease progresses, it often brings about a loss of privacy in communication, especially as the individual's cognitive abilities decline. This loss of privacy can manifest in various ways, such as forgetting who they are talking to, repeating the same information multiple times, or even sharing personal or sensitive information without realizing the implications.
After 7 years into an Alzheimer's diagnosis, the impact on communication becomes more pronounced. The individual may struggle to maintain coherent conversations, leading to a sense of vulnerability and exposure. Furthermore, as the symptoms of the disease worsen over a period of 10+ years, the challenges of maintaining privacy in messages become even more apparent. Loved ones and caregivers may find themselves navigating a delicate balance between respecting the individual's autonomy and ensuring their safety and well-being.
Are you daft?
Where is the support others speak of on their end?
Forget giving me support, how about the one that supported all of the others? Going way beyond the duty of the relationships in question. Ride or die for the ones who cause so much stress over stupid misunderstandings and chaos created by short-term memory lapses.
It is claimed that I communicate through someone else's device and feign responsibility for every single issue. I have never faced any difficulty expressing my thoughts or speaking the truth as I understand it. Why would I even consider engaging in such deceptive tactics? As if I have an abundance of leisure time for such games.
The devastation seen with each event shows the path moving forward, as it did many years ago. The challenge: is irreversible.
So much time is wasted on pure hatred and prideful ignorance. For what??
Do they even know what they are fighting against?
The knowledge that the diagnosis was always a timeline.
The newer health challenges moved up the timeline.
The journey is simply a race against time not one size fits all.
The path was set and yes, I was chosen by the one to fight the hard fight with unwavering resolve. Safety and quality of life.
This is getting old, and no one is here for the drama and mental anguish created for shits and giggles.
Find a new childish game; this one is done.
Plan ahead
Find some fucking kindness
Get in touch with the Gatekeeper
Live within the guidelines for safety and quality of life.
The narrative of this Dazey Diary is clear, forthright, and blunt. It isn't about what I want or need. It is about the one. THE ONLY REASON WE HAVE TO STAY IN COMMUNICATION. This statement is true, not abusive. We are all adults and over 21 years of age.
I refer back to a message sent by the one~
Grow the fuck up.
I'll also add my thoughts on what this means:
Find the path, I no longer can help. Your communication challenges are becoming more difficult and the path forward is in the control of the outside world moving forward for the one.
It is said that I was not clear in years before and created all and every problem to torture the others in their quest of villainizing the only one doing the care… manipulating and gaslighting are my charges, along with being the basic bitch…
The question is simple:
What would any of you do without me?
I leave this here knowing it will be picked apart for the one word they will use for the next battle-
Welcome to birthday/event season; everyone wants me to make sure I buy them a present on the one’s behalf.
The day of days, two weeks later, follows one more disastrous event in the house of care.
At that time, we should all be able to take leave, tend to the wounded, and dig trenches for the battles yet to erupt.
To fight a new day…
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